29.05.18 - Geladeira nas costas

Bom dia,

Hope all is well on your travels, and thanks for the photos! 

This week we've been housebound by a nationwide lorry strike which has led to petrol shortages, blockades on the motorway, cancelled flights, price-gouging, siphoning and general unpleasantness which I've kept well away from in my cushy home-office job. It hasn't been the Mad Max-esque breakdown of society many have been anticipating - we were able to source ingredients for a butternut squash and cured meat risotto at short notice on Saturday, for example - but Gaby had to sit for hours in a queue to get petrol on Friday, and there doesn't seem to be an end in sight at the moment.

We did make it out on Thursday for Taynah's birthday party, at a fancy bar where the drinks are served in miniature bathtubs (with rubber crocodiles, if you please!), and I've tagged along to Gaby's home visits in Morumbi a few times, laying low in the Eldorado mall, apparently home to South America's largest gym.  

I've gone done a mixtape, and my phrase of the day ("a fridge on one's back") refers to a psychological burden one has to live with - I learnt it in relation to the Liverpool goalie's match-scuppering blunders in the Champions League final, which also conjured up the ever-delightful imagery of "mãos de alface" / "lettuce hands" from the Brazilian commentators. Turns out it's a real thing too.

That'll be all,

Needle and Fred 

22.05.18 - Enfiar pela goela abaixo

Halloooo,

All well here in Braseeel.  On Saturday Gaby gave a lecture about her masters topic for a conference in Campinas, so I went along as driver/photographer, almost got blown off the road by a hurricane sweeping the region, had a burger on the way back and stopped off at a cat rescue shelter to donate supplies. Gaby enjoyed that, as you might imagine.

Otherwise it's gone very chilly all of a sudden, we've been putting the finishing touches on our August sojourn, and I've been reading plenty of Tom Wolfe. I also found out that the year of my birth was the first time the terms "steampunk", "techno" and "beer goggles" were used in print. I've made two new compilations, and today's phrase means to "shove [something] down [someone's] throat], figuratively speaking in most cases. 

Speak soon!

Fred Bath & Beyond

15.05.18 - バーコード人

Halloooo,

Lovely to chat the other day, in any number of languages.  The Mother's Day BBQ was a success, and prior to that I tagged along with Gaby as she toured the homes of São Paulo's rich and famous on Friday, before checking out a nearby pizzeria with a bunch of friends.

I've been getting up at unusual hours for work but everything's looking good on that front otherwise, and I had a Bill Murray-esque photoshoot with Ridaut the other day to update my work photo. And on Saturday I watched the original "Solaris" - three hours of solid family entertainment! It was either that or Eurovision.

In the meantime I've made two more compilations, and my phrase of the day comes from Japan - it means "bar code men", and refers to folks with poorly-concealed combovers.  On that note, I urge you to watch all 23 minutes of "No Reaction - Pie Hell!", which I will just leave here with no further explanation.

Speak soon!

Fred Like a Hole

08.05.17 - Topper

Hallooo,

Hope all well with you, misfiring vocal chords notwithstanding.  We are at somewhat of a loss now that we've sanded and painted every wall in our jurisdiction, although we had some friends round on Friday to look at said walls which was rather fun, went to another birthday do on Saturday and the picture house on Sunday to see "A Quiet Place".  Mostly sleeping and booking Air'b'n'b's' in between.

I've made another wild and crazy mixtape, and would also recommend the new John Mulaney stand-up set, "Kid Gorgeous", if you have access to Netflix... No phrase of the week as such, I just thought you ought to know that apparently the youth of Brazil are now referring to cool and awesome things as "topper", like a rambunctious WWI fighter pilot.

'Til next we speak again,

Fred Over Heels

01.05.18 - Não adianta tirar roupa de um santo pra vestir de outro

Hallooo,

  

Thanks very much for your musical intervention the other day, I was extremely grateful, then pleased, then nonplussed, then a little scared, then pleased again. 

As I mentioned, I was in the middle of a three-day binge of excellent food and company, which started on Saturday night with a trip to Dalva e Dito in Jardins Paulista.  I mainly wanted to check "going to a Michelin-starred restaurant" off my bucket list, but it turned out to be pretty great in and of itself. I had poached sole with passionfruit farofa and black rice, followed by an incredible chocolate mousse with cumaru from the Amazon; Gaby unfortunately got the rough end of the stick for the second weekend running and ended up with a rather unremarkable plate of chicken and rice, and a pudim which looked great but apparently didn't taste of much.  Still, it was everything I was hoping for, and we finally opened the bottle of Provence rosé which I got in Antibes last November afterwards...

The next day we went to the infamous Dr. Costela, an all-you-can-eat haven of good cheer and allotment-grown lettuce by the side of the motorway, to see how the other half lives, and ate more meat than was medically advisable, washed down with quarts of the owner's homemade beer. I got a petit gateau, ice cream and a birthday song, and crawled home to recover.  And last night we had the extended family round for dinner, including people dropping in from Minas during the national long weekend, on our newly-renovated balcony which is looking rather swish.

I've made another compilation; I also recommend this one by yer man out of Arctic Monkeys, and of course the new Janelle Monáe album and "emotion picture".  My phrase of the day means "it's no use taking one saint's clothes to clothe another"; i.e. there's no point borrowing from one loan shark to pay off another, for example, since you'll end up straight back in debt.  I don't know, it's been a long weekend...

Speak soon, electric prune

Fred, ombros, joelhos e pé, joelhos e pé

24.04.18 - Engolir sapo

Halloooo,

Lovely to speak to you yesterday, but for the benefit of everyone who wasn't on the call - this week's top headline is Sunday night's triumphant Radiohead gig, my first since 2012.    We went to the fancy new Allianz Parque stadium in the middle of town (home to Palmeiras, so enemy territory...) and ended up in the cheap seats but with a fairly decent view.  I had a fantastic time, especially during Let Down and a rousing, set-closing run of No Surprises, Weird Fishes/Arpeggi, 2+2=5 and Idioteque, not to mention Paranoid Android AND Fake Plastic Trees at the end of the second encore.  

Gaby was less impressed, which is understandable given she couldn't see much, the sound wasn't great until about halfway through, the setlist was heavy on weird techno stuff and Thom was in a particularly odd mood, cackling manically in between songs (still warbled up an absolute storm on Pyramid Song and Nude, mind you) - not ideal conditions for a newbie.  I spent all week trying to convince her Radiohead don't deserve their sad-sack reputation, only for them to open the main set with Daydreaming and the first encore with Exit Music (for a Film), for example.  But I agreed to grout the balcony with her over the weekend so she wasn't allowed to complain.

Otherwise went to footy and band practice (going to start going to rehearsals in a fur coat), did a lot of housework, and braced myself against a tropical storm of work a-brewin' on the horizon.  Gaby's been doing so much sanding of walls that she ended up in A&E with mild carpal tunnel syndrome - at least the end is in sight... And this weekend it's ma birthday and I've booked a table at Dalva e Dito, by all accounts one of the best restaurants in town, which I'm quite looking forward to. 

I've made another two compilations, and my phrase of the day means "to swallow the frog", or grin and bear it - not unlike Egyptians during the great frog plague of Exodus, or Gaby at the concert...

Speak soon,

Radiofred

17.04.18 - Quem planta vento colhe tempestade

Ha, and indeed, lloooo. 

Hope all well over there and that the sun has finally got its hat on.  Over here we've been engaged in a war of attrition with our balcony walls, throwing spackling around wildly and giving the poor cat endless baths so he doesn't spread dust throughout the whole house. We're about halfway through, touch wood.

I've also been out to t'footy, where I scored an absolute blooter of a volley and accidentally bit someone on the head; to band practice where we expanded our repertoire still further; and to a housewarming out east on Saturday night, with pizza and caipirinhas galore.

I've made two more comps, and my phrase of the day translates as "he who sows wind shall reap the whirlwind", which is a very biblical way of saying what goes around, comes around.

Speak soon!

Freddy Perkins